Hello Therapist: I'm 20 & find it awkward to share room with my brother; My friends don't visit due to it

Dr. Rahul Khemani, Consultant Psychiatrist in Wockhardt Hospital, Mira Road is here to solve all your anonymous doubts. Read on to know more.

Updated on Dec 24, 2020 03:02 PM IST  |  1.1M
Hello Therapist: I'm 20 & find it awkward to share room with my brother; My friends don't visit due to it
Hello Therapist: I'm 20 & find it awkward to share room with my brother; My friends don't visit due to it
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Hello Therapist, 

I'm a 20-year-old girl and I share a room with my brother. I find it very uncomfortable to do that now. I don't like it as my friends also don't visit our house. I don't want to trouble anyone but I'm getting angry at him. Please advice.


Dear Pinkvilla Reader, 

Thank you for asking this question, as it is a very common scenario particularly in India. 

To begin with, I'd ask you to look at your anger towards him. What is it really about? Is it because you don't have space to yourself? Is it because your friends said no to visit you and you were embarrassed about it? Are his any particular habits annoying?

Once we have looked at that, the next step is to have a conversation with him. You could talk to him and your parents about how limited space can be managed. For instance, if your friends are coming over, can he stay in the living room for that time or sleep in some other room. If the concern is about privacy you could negotiate him leaving the room, and vice versa for that particular time. If the concern is about mental and physical space, can you look at other places in your house, such as a balcony or verandah to be with yourself? The point is to negotiate better. You might have to adjust to certain situations and scenarios, but communicating concerns is the key.


Involve your parents in the conversation as they could negotiate and understand better. It is likely that your brother is facing his own concerns too.

Do you have a question to ask? Email us your queries at editorial@pinkvilla.com with ‘Hello Therapist’ in the subject. Shh… don’t worry, we’ll make sure to keep everything anonymous!

Disclaimer: Hello Therapist is an infotainment feature. The information contained in these topics is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, it is provided for infotainment purposes only. By submitting your queries to Pinkvilla, you agree that we may use and edit it partially /full for clarity and ease of understanding of our readers. The advice given is not be used as a substitute for consultation with a professional psychologist or other professional health or medical provider.

ALSO READ: Hello Therapist: I’m 30 and my family is making me meet girls; I’m not ready for marriage, so please help

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1 year ago
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