Hello Therapist: I'm not good at studies & my family members think I'm useless; I feel depressed; Please help

In Hello Therapist - our anonymous new segment, today, we have Dr Rahul Ratan Bagale Psychiatrist & Psychotherapist, Apollo Clinic Pune solving your personal doubts.
Hello Therapist: I'm not good at studies & my family members think I'm useless; I feel depressed; Please help
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Hello Therapist, 

Actually, I'm not really good at studies nor I know what I'm good at either...And all my family members think I'm useless which makes it even more difficult for me...And also I'm not really close to my family so I really feel lonely and depressed. I feel empty what do I do?

Hello Pinkvilla Reader,

It would have been really imperative to know your age, to know about this phase you're going through. Most likely this empty feeling is experienced during adolescence or early adulthood...So let's assume your age between 16 to 22 for the sake of understanding the current issue.

As you are aware that you haven't been that good in academics yet, nevertheless you don't know whether you're good at something extra-curricular.

Reasons for lack of interest in academics could be - not been availed adequate opportunities to learn, borderline intelligence quotient, inattention, learning disability, fear of academics, stress & so on. You may need professional help if you're struggling with your studies since the schooling, so as to figure out the exact issue behind deficits in academic learning & the possible solution accordingly. Please do remind yourself that, not been good at studies should never impact the rest of the domains of your life. You just haven't been able to figure out, what are the things you are good into. It is your age when a person explores his surroundings & seeks for the passion within for rest of life. If you haven't been able to explore that yet, maybe you need to put some efforts into it. Friendship is an important learning aspect in this age where one tries to learn through imitation & inspiration. You are born into this world, with something inside you that will keep you striving for next 20-30 years...it could be an art, sport, music, literature, adventure or any activity that makes you feel good about yourself.

Your academic grades don’t define your worth...please make it clear with yourself & your family as well. Take your own time & figure out what's that flame inside you which is been not lit up yet. Believe me...once you find out your Ikigai (the reason for being), you won't feel that bad about yourself. There are many legendary examples around where, though this passion been found a bit late, people have pursued it & living with content thereafter. The current world is as equally a skill focussed one as important are your academic grades. So you don't need to fear about the future if you're still exploring with your passion.

Constant criticism & lack of affection been expressed by family members may make you feel hopeless about the future or worthless about yourself. Your family needs to be counselled about this issue if they haven't been supportive to you at this stage. Feeling empty, lonely & helpless may drag you into a state of depression if some measures aren't been taken in the right time. Avoidance to communicate with family & friends may occur if they haven't been that considerate or rather they're overtly critical with you. But, socialising is an important part of human existence & it's needed for preserving your mental health as well. I would also like to warn you to avoid using any addictive substance during this phase, else the situation may only worsen. I hope this helps you to take a step further to your well being...TakeCare & Best wishes for your self-exploratory journey. Hope you gain your self worth back in this pursuit :-)

Do you have a question to ask? Email us your queries at editorial@pinkvilla.com with ‘Hello Therapist’ in the subject. Shh… don’t worry, we’ll make sure to keep everything anonymous!

Disclaimer: Hello Therapist is an infotainment feature. The information contained in these topics is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, it is provided for infotainment purposes only. By submitting your queries to Pinkvilla, you agree that we may use and edit it partially /full for clarity and ease of understanding of our readers. The advice given is not be used as a substitute for consultation with a professional psychologist or other professional health or medical provider.

Also Read: Hello Therapist: My manager thinks I am rude, I feel lost & don’t know what I am doing; How can I handle this?

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Anonymous 4 months ago

LOL! My colleagues think I am useless. We are all on the same boat I guess.