Here’s what the modern approach to effective fatherhood should be like

1 month ago  |  92K
Here’s what the modern approach to effective fatherhood should be like

Let's get one thing out of the way. It's no longer about "if" you play a more profound role in being a hands-on dad. Dads for ages have played a largely hands-off role in their kid's lives. And not for lack of wanting to! In most cases, but rather because that's how things have been structured by society in general. 


And while many broke that norm, it's only in recent years has it become a clear cut aspect of fatherhood to be "hands-on". And I say it's about time. Because being a modern dad is many things. But what it is at its core is deeply fulfilling, rewarding and tons of fun. So, while no parenting methodology is perfect or replicable in its exact form, here's a few things I've discovered in my four years of fatherhood. 



You're in a team sport with your partner


Being a father in today's world is about being an equal partner in sharing the work that it takes to be a parent and being an emotional partner to ride the highs and lows that come with parenting. Also, take care of the grunt work like diapers, night shifts, etc. Do the stuff that makes your partner's life easier. 


There is no rule book


Unlike moms, there isn't as much content out there for you to consume on being a dad. So in many ways, you're figuring it out as you go along. You learn on the job, so start with doing stuff and envision what kind of relationship you want to have with your kid and work towards that. Because you're not just a parent or a friend or a clown, you're all of the above and more so find and evolve what composition defines you as a father.



Be present


Be there for things that matter, and I don't mean school days and birthday parties. Be there for the random time she wants to paint or understand how butterflies come to be or play in the rain. Be there for the moments because that's what being a father and a parent is about. the moments. 


They define your relationship and your decisions and bring you the most joy you could have ever imagined. 


About the author: Varun Duggirala is a content creator, podcaster, entrepreneur, and personal development pundit. 


Also Read: Parental Burnout: Signs of THIS emotional state and 3 ways to cope with it