3 Challenges that gay men face in the dating world

Here are some of the common gay dating obstacles.

Updated on May 18, 2022 09:55 AM IST  |  145.7K
Challenges in gay dating.
Reasons why gay dating is difficult
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Same-sex dating is frequently more frustrating, unstable, discouraging, complex, and risky than heterosexual dating. It's difficult to spot potential dates in the crowd. Society socialises us from birth to find a mate and live happily ever after, but this is a much more difficult task than is portrayed in fairy tales, romance movies, and the media. And if this is the case for straight people, imagine what the LGBT community would do. Dating within the gay community has become somewhat problematic, as the emphasis has shifted toward casual sex rather than long-term relationships. However, this only covers the basics of the issues that gay men face when it comes to online dating.

Here, we bring you 3 reasons that make gay dating difficult these days.


1. Casual dating apps 

We've become so set in the ways that we treat dating like a shopping experience. If he doesn't meet our criteria and requirements, he goes back on the shelf. And these online dating apps even make it more accessible to meet a sexual partner whenever and wherever we want, right at our fingertips. So casual hook-ups have become a thing now. We often have an unrealistic idea of who we want to meet, and anyone who falls short of that standard is dismissed and we continue our search. With so many men focused on the casual dating scene, it has become more difficult to find gay men interested in serious dating, let alone those who use serious dating sites or apps.

2. Unrealistic expectations

Gay men do find it difficult to find a suitable partner and this is one of the major reasons. Having a long set of demands for people to meet not only reduces your chances of meeting someone, but it can also give you unrealistic expectations of who you want to date There's nothing wrong with having core values, ethics, traits, or even a personality type. However, imagining the perfect guy and comparing everyone you meet to him not only creates unrealistic standards but also scares off people who you might have been suited with.

level of outness

3. Your levels of "outness" differ

When you are out in the public, dating gay people becomes easier. They are not afraid to show their love and affection in front of their family, co-workers, friends and the entire society. However, if the partner is not yet out in public, it complicates the entire tangent because the partner will always be concerned about what to post and what not to post on social media, holding hands in public surrounded by the public, and so on. It becomes difficult to be with someone who is closeted for a very long time. The false relationship he has with himself and his family is built on lies that he needs to break in order to come with you.

Also Read: Love Matters: 13 Great first date questions for gay men

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