65 Funny Family Quotes: Giggles And Grins with Loved Ones

Laugh along with these best 65 hilarious collections of funny family quotes. Discover the fun and charm of diverse families in this collection full of laughter.

Updated on Sep 22, 2023   |  05:32 PM IST  |  148.6K
funny family quotes
funny family quotes

Presenting a delightful assortment of happy family and funny family quotes  —  those beloved, crazy, and loving clans that can leave you in stitches. Families, an indispensable thread in our lives, have an amusing way of keeping us on our toes, joyously poking fun or hilariously embarrassing us before the world. However, family screening allows us to understand the dynamics and characteristics of normal and extended families. Sometimes, we may encounter a crazy person within the family, but that uniqueness often adds flavor to the family ties. 

Related Story


Hilarious Step Brothers Quotes: Cherish This Unique Relationship

Every family is a one-of-a-kind ensemble, a delightful fusion of various characters residing together beneath a single roof – akin to a troupe of endearing clowns. While some families may have a repetitive pattern of behavior or inside jokes, the informality of family life can create cherished memories and moments that bring joy and laughter. Prepare to be amused and find solace in these humorous quotes on family, for they will surely strike a chord of recognition within you.

65 Funny Family Quotes: Where Love And Laughter Collide

Life is an ever-evolving journey filled with valuable lessons, and one of the most important lessons it teaches us is the significance of family. A family vacation, for instance, exemplifies the essence of togetherness and creates lasting memories that become part of the family motto. Each family carries its unique traits, idiosyncrasies, and lesson of life, which make them special. These funny family quotes are a lighthearted reminder of the quirks and charms that define our loved ones.


Funny Quotes About Family

funny family quotes

1. “Nothing in life is fun for the whole family. There are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry.” — Jerry Seinfeld

2. “When our relatives are at home, we have to think of all their good points or it would be impossible to endure them.” — George Bernard Shaw

3. “As a child, my family’s menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.” — Buddy Hackett

4. "Family dynamics can be like a rollercoaster - thrilling, unpredictable, and sometimes you just want to scream!" — Anonymous

5. “Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.” — Chelsea Handler

6. “If you want to call a family meeting, just turn off the Wi-Fi router and wait in the room where it’s located.” — Anonymous

7. “Respect your parents. They passed school without Google.” — Anonymous

8. “Family: a social unit where the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space.” — Anonymous

9. “I know family comes first, but shouldn’t that mean after breakfast?” — Jeff Lindsay

10. “There is so much I love about our little family, especially when they are all asleep.” — Unknown

11. “I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.” — Erma Bombeck

12. “And then I thought to myself, what is the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?” — Anonymous

13. “‘Thomas,’ the boss said. ‘How’s your father doing?’ ‘He’s good, Sal.’ Always the family questions first. That was Sal Demenci’s style. He could be about to whack someone and he’d ask how the guy’s sister was doing in school.” — Gary Ponzo

14. “Within families, you’re stuck with the character they think you are, whatever you do. You become a war hero and all that your parents ever talk about is something supposedly funny you used to do when you were in nursery school.” — Nicci French

15. “You don’t have to be afraid of me. Eugene likes you. Doc likes you. That means I like you. We’re all family now. All the funny little people who live in the cracks of the world.” — Richard Cadrey


Crazy Funny Family Quotes

funny family quotes

16. “Heaven makes you family, but a new generation of selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors can make you friends.” — Gina Barreca

17. “Blood is thicker than water but maple syrup is thicker than blood, so technically pancakes are more important than family.” — Anonymous

18. “My kids call it yelling when I raise my voice. I call it motivational speaking for the selective listener.” — Anonymous

19. “Family is like pizza. It’s messy, might give you a stomachache, and you can’t get enough of it.” — Anonymous

20. “I don’t have to look up my family tree, because I know that I’m the sap.” — Fred Allen

21. “I’ve come to learn that the best time to debate family members is with food in their mouths.” — Anonymous

22. “I realized my family was funny because nobody ever wanted to leave our house.” — Anthony Anderson

23. “Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life.” — Anonymous

24. “Nothing better than spending the entire morning staring into my baby daughter’s eyes, whispering, ‘I can’t do this.'” — Ryan Reynolds

25. “Children aren’t happy without something to ignore, and that’s what parents were invented for.” — Ogden Wash

26. “I have a funny family, but none of them are remotely in show business.”  —  Wanda Sykes

27. “Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.” — George Burns

28. “Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn’t have anything to do with it.” — Haim Ginott

29.  “When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” — Mark Twain

30. “The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.” — George Carlin

Funny Family Reunion Quotes

funny family quotes

31. “Where does the family start? It starts with a young man falling in love with a girl  —  no superior alternative has yet been found.” — Winston Churchill


32. “People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one.” — Leo J. Burke

33.  “All of the men in my family are bearded, and most of the women.” — W.C. Fields

34. “A family unit is composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.” — Ogden Nash

35. “Bleeding ulcers run in my family. We give them to each other.” — Lois McMaster Bujold

36.  “Everyone knows how to raise children except the people who have them.” — M.J. O’Rourke

37. “Having a child makes you a parent; having two, you are a referee.” — Anonymous

38. “Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat back word for word what you shouldn’t have said.” — Anonymous

39. “Parenthood: that state of being better chaperoned than you were before marriage.” — Marcelene Cox

40. “The advantage of only having one child is that you always know who did it.” — Erma Bombeck

Short Funny Family Quotes

funny family quotes

41. “Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime.” — Red Skeleton 41. “If I ever had twins, I’d use one for parts.” — Steven Wright

42. “Having children is like living in a frat house—nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.” — Ray Romano

43. “Children really can brighten up a house because they never turn the lights off.” — Ralph Bus

44.  “Nobody is more full of false hope than a Mom who places items on the stairs for her family members to carry up.” — Anonymous

45. “It’s not easy being a mom. If it were easy, fathers would do it.” — Betty White

46. “I know if mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” — Jeff Foxworthy

47. “The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.” — Calvin Trillin

48.  “When your mother asks for a piece of advice, it’s a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no, you’re going to get it anyway.” — Erma Bombeck

49.  “Siblings that say they never fight are most likely hiding something.” — Lemony Snicket


Funny Quotes From Modern Family

funny family quotes

50. “Whenever anyone finds out there are seven kids in my family, they imagine my mom and dad having sex.” — Rachel DeWoskin

51. “Siblings: children of the same parents, who are perfectly normal until they get together.” — Sam Levenson

52.  “Older siblings are like your parent’s personal science fair. They’re a bunch of experiments.” — Anonymous

53. “I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance—waiting for the bathroom.” — Bob Hope

54. “The advantage of growing up with siblings is that you become very good at fractions.” — Richard Brault

55. “Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in.” — Robert Frost

56.  “I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.” — Rodney Dangerfield

57. "Family: Where life begins and love never ends, but the laundry pile is always a mile high." — Anonymous

58. "I love my family, but if they ever decide to form a band, I'm definitely joining the witness protection program." — Anonymous

59. "Home is where the heart is, but my family insists on leaving their socks everywhere else." — Anonymous

Inspirational Quotes Funny Family Quotes

funny family quotes

60. "You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your family. Unless you have a good lawyer."  —  Anonymous

61. "Family: where life's craziest moments become hilarious memories, and we all laugh at each other's uniquely lovable quirks." — Unknown

62. "My family is like fudge—mostly sweet, with a few nuts!"  —  Anonymous

63. "Family gatherings: Where everyone brings their opinions and nobody leaves them at home." — Anonymous

64. "In our family, we have a war strategy for Monopoly that would put Sun Tzu to shame." — Anonymous

65. "I love when relatives come over, and my mom starts acting all innocent, saying, 'Oh, I don't know where the good snacks are,' while the secret stash is under lock and key." — Anonymous

66. "The informality of family life is a great teacher. It shows us that even in chaos, love can thrive." — Anonymous

67. "I told my family I wanted a watch for my birthday, so they gave me a kitchen timer. They really know how to turn back time!" — Melanie White



Not only your family but there are also some suburban families or unhappy families who struggle with their differences from time to time. These funny family sayings will help those immortal families find solace despite occasional family disagreements. 

So, don't hesitate to share these funny family quotes with your loved ones because laughter is even more infectious when shared with family. Embrace the unique bond you share, relish in the moments of hilarity, and cherish the memories that will make you smile for years. Embrace the joy, embrace the love, and embrace the laughter that only a family can bring. Share these quotes with your family and enjoy the laughter-filled moments that will undoubtedly follow.


ALSO READ: 70 Heartwarming Family Bonding Quotes to Nurture Connections

150 Heartwarming Family Time Quotes to Cherish

About The Author
Aastha Pahadia
Aastha Pahadia
Certified Relationship Coach

Aastha is a certified Relationship coach and she strives to help those who seek expert advice on relationships.



Latest Articles