20 Ways On How to Console Someone Through Difficult Times

It is possible to feel lost while trying to console someone, especially if you aren't sure. But some smart techniques may help you cheer your friend in need.

Updated on May 13, 2023   |  07:21 PM IST  |  49K
How to console someone
How to console someone

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It can be tough to see someone you care about going through a difficult time. Whether they are dealing with a loss, a breakup, or just having a rough day, knowing how to console someone can be a challenge. However, there are many ways to comfort someone when they need it most. By being empathetic, listening actively, and offering words of encouragement, you can help ease their pain and show them that they are not alone. Whether it is a disaster of epic proportions or a small hiccup in their day, there is always a way to lift someone's spirits when they are feeling down. With a little bit of creativity, a dash of humor, and a whole lot of love, you can turn frowns into smiles and tears into laughter. So, let us put on our imaginary superhero capes and embark on a journey to spread comfort to those in need!

20 Way to Console Someone


How to console someone

Whether you are uncertain about how to reassure your near and dear ones because you may not know what to say to make someone feel better, or are worried about making things worse, it is okay to feel a little bit awkward. Not that you don't care, but the discomfort you may come across is normal. That is why we are here to offer you the best suggestions on how to console someone and what you can do to make the situation feel more manageable for them.

1. Be Their Safe Space


How to console someone

Being a safe space for someone can be the most important thing of all. When your loved one is going through a difficult time, giving them a sense of being heard, seen, and understood can make all the difference. 

For example, if your friend is experiencing uneasiness, you can be a safe space by letting them know they can talk to you without fear of judgment. This way, you can make them feel less alone and more supported as they navigate their way through their troubles.

2.  Listen to Them


How to console someone

When it comes to consoling someone, listening is the name of the game. Not only does it show that you care, but it also allows the person to vent their feelings and get things off their chest. 

For example, if your friend just went through a bad breakup, instead of jumping in with solutions, you can listen to them as they talk about their feelings and validate their emotions. You might say, "I'm here for you and I'm listening. It sounds like you are hurting right now, and that is okay. You don't have to go through this alone." Perhaps all your friend needs is someone to simply ask them how they are doing and sit with them as they sob. This is the time to give them your undivided attention and simply be there for them.

3. Keep the Conversation Centered on Them

How to console someone

Make sure that you are paying full attention to what your friend is saying when you are on your way to figuring out what to do when someone is sad. By keeping your entire focus on them, you show that you care and that you are there to help them through their struggles. 


Asking your buddy how they are feeling, what they need, and what you can do to support them may help you keep the conversation centered around them. You’ll have to put their needs first and make sure that you do not get carried away with the conversation.

4. Do Not Offer Any Advice


How to console someone

Sometimes the best thing you can do is just be there for them without offering any advice. It might seem a bit counterintuitive, but at times people just need someone to listen and understand, rather than someone to tell them what to do. 

For example, if your friend is going through a tough time at work, instead of offering solutions or advice, you can simply say, "I'm here for you and I support you. Whatever happens, I believe in you and I know you'll get through it." By offering love and support without judgment or solutions, you can create a safe space for your friend to heal and find their way forward.

5. Let Them Know You Care


How to console someone

It is important to let someone know that you are there for them through thick and thin, even if you are not physically present for them at the time. This would be like a small ray of sunshine on a gloomy day. 

A text message or phone call can be used to let your loved one know you are thinking of them if they are going through a difficult period. Even just remembering them in your prayers would be a thoughtful gesture on your part. One of the best ways to console someone far away is to let them know they are always in your thoughts.

6. Be Understanding According to the Situation

How to console someone

When you wonder how to console someone, know that patience, and understanding perfectly go hand in hand together and make everything better for the grieving person. With your utmost patience, you offer a safe environment where your friend can discuss their feelings and solve their life problems at their own pace. 

For example, if your loved one is going through a tough time, you can be patient and understanding by listening to them without any judgment, even if it takes a while for them to open up. You might say, "I'm here for you, and I'll listen as long as you need me to. You do not have to rush or feel like you must have it all figured out right now.” By being patient and understanding, you show your friend that you care about them and that you are willing to support them through whatever they are going through.


7. Send Them Words of Encouragement Via Texts



How to console someone

Sending encouraging texts is like a little boost of positivity that can help turn their day around for anybody feeling low. A wonderful method to let someone in and let them believe in you is to offer them words of encouragement. It is like wrapping a rope around their concerns and guiding them toward a more promising future. 

So, if anybody is going through a tough time, you can send them an encouraging text to let them know that you are there for them. You could say, "I just wanted to remind you how strong and amazing you are! You've got this, and I'm here to support you every step of the way." By sending an encouraging text, you show that you care and believe in their ability to overcome their challenges.

8.  Offer Unconditional Support


How to console someone

Giving unwavering support when someone requires comfort is like being the person's dependable sidekick. No matter what challenges they face, you are there to help them overcome them and shine into the sunset. Like a superhero's cape, you should always be there to provide them with the courage and support they need to keep going. 

So, if someone is going through a tough time, you can offer them unconditional support by saying, "I'm here for you, partner! No matter what happens, I've got your back and we're in this together." By providing your near and dear ones with unrestricted love and support, you let them know they are not alone and they can rely on you at all times to get them through difficult days.

9. Do Not Ignore Them

How to console someone

The last thing you want to do if you are trying to figure out how to console someone is run away from them in a panic and avoid them. When someone is going through a tough time, they need support and empathy, not avoidance. Ignoring someone gives the wrong impression that you do not care or don't want to be involved, which can make the person feel even more alone and isolated. 

For example, if your friend is going through a challenging period and reaches out to you for support. You may be busy with your own life, but it is important not to ignore their message or let go of their feelings. Instead, take the time to listen to them and offer words of comfort. It is important to show up for the people you care about, even if it feels uncomfortable or challenging.


10. Cook a Comforting Meal


How to console someone

Cooking someone a hearty meal is a great way to console them because it is a tangible way to show that you care. Food has a way of bringing people together, and sharing a meal can create a sense of comfort and connection. Making supper for someone struggling can be a considerate and helpful deed because they might lack the energy or motivation to cook for themselves. 

For example, if your friend is going through a tough phase, you can offer to make a homemade meal for them, which can turn out to be a welcome distraction from their troubles. Also, a hearty and comforting meal may help lift their spirits and provide comfort during a challenging time.

11. Make Them Heal with the Power of Laughter


How to console someone

Laughter can be a powerful tool when it comes to comforting someone. So, encouraging someone to laugh can turn out to be a great method to give them a momentary break from their troubles and make them feel a little bit better. 

For example, if your friend is going through a breakup, you can lighten the situation by cracking some silly jokes or watching a funny movie. Of course, it is important to be sensitive to the person's needs and feelings - you don't want to make light of their situation or be insensitive. But if you can find a way to inject a little humor into the scenario, it can be a powerful way to help them feel more relaxed, hopeful, and supported.

12.   Lend a Hand in Doing Favors

How to console someone

Doing favors for someone is a great way to provide a comfortable feeling to them, as it shows that you are willing to go out of your way to help them feel much more okay. When someone is going through a tough phase, they may not have the energy or resources to take care of all the tasks and chores they might as well need to do. 

Offering to do things like grocery shopping, walking their dog, or picking up their kids from school can provide some much-needed relief and support. By doing these favors, you are not only helping the person out practically, but you are also sending the message that they are not alone and that you are there to help in any way you can.


13. Give Warm Hugs


How to console someone

Whether it is a long embrace or a quick squeeze, the simple act of hugging can help to bring comfort and healing during difficult times. By giving someone a loving hug, you can provide them with support, comfort, and a physical connection that can lessen their suffering and ease their pain. Hugs are also scientifically proven to release feel-good hormones like oxytocin, which can help to reduce stress (1). They can also help lower blood pressure and promote feelings of calm and relaxation (1). In addition to the physical benefits, hugs can also send a powerful message of empathy and compassion. 

So, when you wrap your arms around someone, you are showing them that you care, that you get what they are going through, and that you are available for them in such trying times.

14. Share the Time When You Faced Similar Hardship


How to console someone

Sharing your story of grief when consoling someone can be a powerful way to connect with the person and show that you understand what they are going through. It is common to feel lonely and aloof when confronted with a challenging scenario. However, finding out that another person has had a similar situation can be reassuring and validating. Sharing your story can also be a way to model resilience and show that it is possible to come out the other side of grief. 

For example, let's say you're consoling a friend who has just lost a loved one. You might share your own story of losing someone close to you and how you coped with that loss. You could talk about the different emotions you experienced, how you sought support, and what helped you to eventually heal. When you are sharing your story, you are not only providing comfort to your friend, but you are also showing them that there is hope for them to move on in their life.

15. Send a Care Package


How to console someone

Making a care package for comforting a friend you want to console is a thoughtful and practical way to show your support. When someone is going through a tough time, they may not have the energy or resources to take care of themselves as well as they would like. A care package can provide them with some much-needed comfort and happiness during a difficult period. 


Even though the contents of a care package can vary depending on the person and situation, some ideas could include things like their favorite snacks or treats, a journal, scented candles, or a handwritten note or card. Putting together a care package shows that you have put thought and effort into providing something meaningful for the person.

16. Introduce a Support Group


How to console someone

When someone is going through a difficult time, it can be helpful for them to talk to others who have been through similar experiences. That is where support groups come in. Support groups offer a secure setting where members can talk about their feelings, experiences, and views with others who can relate. If you want to console someone, recommending a support group can be a great way to show your support. Support groups come in all shapes and sizes, and there are groups available for almost any type of situation. 

For example, there are support groups for people who have lost a loved one, support groups for people dealing with addiction, and support groups for people with chronic illnesses.

17. Take Them Out


How to console someone

Someone going through a trying moment could feel alone and very secluded. By asking them out and spending some time with them, you can comfort them. Going out can be a great distraction from their worries and can help them to take their mind off things for a while. It can also be a way to offer support and show them that you are with them in their tough phase. 

You can invite them to do something fun and uplifting, like going to a movie, trying a new restaurant, or going for a hike. Or you can simply invite them to spend time with you, whether it is going for a walk, having coffee, or just hanging out at home and spending some quality time.

18. Tell Them Know it is Okay to Let Their Emotions Out


How to console someone

Crying is a natural and healthy way for people to release their emotions. Someone going through a tough situation might feel like they have to be strong and keep their tears back. But at the same time, it's important to let them know that it's okay to cry and that it's a normal part of the healing process. When you console someone, it is important to create a safe space where they can express their emotions without fear of judgment or criticism. You can relieve any pressure they may be feeling to suppress their feelings by reassuring them that it is totally acceptable to cry and let those hidden feelings out. 


For example, if your friend is going through a heartbreak and is having a tough time dealing with their emotions, you can encourage them to express their feelings and let them out. You can say things like, “It is okay to cry, do not hold your feelings back. I am here.” Crying can also be a way for some people to release built-up tension and stress, which can help them feel better in the long run. It is really important to offer comfort and support while they are crying, whether it's a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear.

19. Shower Them with Love


How to console someone


By expressing your affection to someone, you offer a very strong message of reassurance and consideration. It communicates to them your concern for them and your unwavering support no matter what happens. This can be a very comforting and reassuring feeling, especially when someone is going through a difficult time where they are bound to feel emotions of isolation and fear. 

Instead of just saying, “I am here for you,” you can take action to show them love. Sending a thoughtful text, preparing a good meal, or planning a day out with that person can really uplift their spirits. Love is a very powerful emotion that can help to heal wounds and bring people together. So, it is kind of important to express your love for someone when they are going through a tough time, as it can help them feel more connected and supported.

20. Take Out Some Time for Your Personal Care


How to console someone

Supporting and caring for others can be emotionally draining and exhausting, and it is equally important to take care of your own mental and physical health and well-being. 

This can include activities like exercise, meditation, spending time with friends and family, or simply taking a break to do something you enjoy. By taking care of yourself, you will be better equipped to provide meaningful support and care for others. Remember, your self-care is just as important as consoling someone else.

So, the next time you are unsure about how to console someone, these tips should come in handy. They will assist you in providing comfort and support to your loved ones like a pro. Of course, consoling someone is not rocket science, but it does require empathy, patience, and a willingness to be present for someone in their time of need. So, let's all try to comfort one another while also spreading a little love and kindness! 

ALSO READ: 96 Condolence Messages to a Friend to Express Your Support

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About The Author
Aastha Pahadia
Aastha Pahadia
Certified Relationship Coach

Aastha is a certified Relationship coach and she strives to help those who seek expert advice on relationships. As a ...

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