How to Forget About Your Ex? Essential Tips to Get over the Past

Discover the proven secrets of how to forget about your ex and move on with a wide grin. Our relationship guide will help you deal better with your love life!

Anubhuti Mishra
Written by Anubhuti Mishra , Relationship Expert
Updated on Jun 01, 2024 | 04:36 PM IST | 216.3K
How to Forget About Your Ex
How to Forget About Your Ex

Overcoming or moving on from a past relationship isn’t easy. For years, you have invested yourself emotionally into one person, and suddenly your love life comes to a halt. Yes, it is challenging to get along with the broken pieces of your heart, but what is more essential is the urge to find effective solutions to how to forget about your ex so that you can embrace the present with a positive outlook. Whether you find yourself sinking into an ocean of unstoppable feelings, trapped in endless flashbacks, or dealing with lingering emotions, you ought to understand that overcoming the past requires self-discovery, reflection, and patience. It is more of a psychological process, largely dominated by time, that helps you navigate through the tough times of your life.

However, it is only you who can make this self-transformative journey sound a lot more soothing. With the right keys to how to forget something that bothers you,  your breakup will merely be a chapter of history, giving you a chance to note down important life lessons. 

To know how to let go of an ex and move on with resilience and grace, explore the essential tips and insights, and leave the past behind. From creating a supportive environment to understanding your feelings better, everything plays a crucial role in terms of healing completely. So, let us embark on this journey together and discover the proven secrets of how to forget your ex and value the present with a renewed sense of self.

How to Forget About Your Ex And Move On Easily

How to Forget About Your Ex

When a short or long-term relationship ends, things change, and life turns upside down. You suddenly start feeling abandoned on an island with no one around. With tears rolling down your cheeks, sleepless nights, and swollen eyes, accepting the truth might seem harsh, but that’s inevitable! Months pass, but the scratches on your heart remain while you still murmur to yourself, “How to get over my ex?” We have an answer - speed up your healing process by setting healthy boundaries for better mental health! 

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The pain of a breakup is universal and so are the solutions for kickstarting a fresh chapter of your life. While your heart grieves, carry out activities to make it feel less heavy and rarely overwhelmed. We understand forgetting an ex whom you truly adored is a tough nut to crack, but there’s light at the end of every tunnel. A light of contentment and a glistening ray of sunshine, giving you the sign to inhale the fresh air of positivity. 

Sometimes, getting over someone is good for yourself. So, chin up, roll your eyes over, and dive into to-do’s of how to forget about your ex, and live a peaceful life with no strings of the past attached. 

How to Stop Thinking About Your Ex? 25 Vital Steps You Need to Take

How to Stop Thinking About Your Ex

1. Accept Your Breakup

First and foremost, accept the truth. Accept the fact that you have broken up with your partner. Stop looking out for ways, signs, or any kind of hope to get back together. You cannot undo things, so it is better to accept what happened and console yourself. Acceptance of your breakup is hence, the very crucial and the primary step to how to forget the ex for the good.

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2. Grieve And Get Your Emotions out

Once you and your partner have parted ways, you unknowingly enter into the grieving period. You feel lifeless, disheartened, and lost. But that’s completely alright! So, do not try to contain your disappointments, feelings, and emotions in a jar. The lid will pop out. Remember, you can’t fix the pieces of your heart hurriedly, but you can ensemble them like a jigsaw puzzle. The key here is to get your emotions out to feel better from within. Cry, yell, or scream — it is your immediate reaction to the action. In simple words, it is a part of your recovery process and a step to how to forget an ex with time.

 

3. Write Down What You Feel

How to Stop Thinking About Your Ex

Let the pages of your diary drink ink. Write down what you feel because at times your near and dear ones might get bored of you talking about your breakup or in rare cases, you might feel a little hesitant to speak out openly to someone. So, write down your painful feelings on paper or in your personal diary to move on from your ex. The main intention here is to vent out everything and let your heart feel less heavy. 

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4. Understand Your Feelings

Nobody will understand your feelings better than yourself. It is obviously one of the hardest things to do, but it is way more effective than any other after-breakup solution. To an extent, you will be distracting your mind or engaging in activities to avoid your feelings, but that’s all temporary. Hence, understanding or feeling your emotions is vital to learning how to stop thinking about an ex.

 

5. Stop Blaming Yourself

Get over your blame games once and for all. When you drift apart, you often blame yourself unnecessarily. However, while doing so, the thoughts of your ex will often procure your mind. If you want to learn how to get over your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend, then it is better to avoid indulging in any self-blaming game. 

 

6. Avoid Sleeping Together 

If you were committed to a live-in relationship with your partner, stop sleeping together. Close the doors of everything that makes you feel intimidated. Sleeping on the same bed might worsen your case and never let you stop thinking about your ex.

 

7. Avoid Texting or Messaging

 How to Forget About Your Ex

Don’t text your ex to test how cool or warm the water is. Even if you do it in a friendly way, your case can become compulsive. The best thing to do is, delete the contact number so that you don’t get prompted to text them first. 

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8. Create a No-contact Rule

Avoid visiting places where you know that your ex will be present. Set boundaries for yourself if you want to move on from your ex. Create a no-contact rule for say 30 days, a period to focus on healing yourself completely. This will help in moving on quickly with a positive mind. 

 

9. No Friendly Bussiness 

Breakups are acceptable after a few months, but keeping your friendship alive is a risky business that will never let you find an answer to how to get over your ex. If you still keep in touch, hang out together, or spend time, then he or she is never going to get out of your head. So, stay away from friendly business!

 

10. Dump Things That Reminds You of Your Ex

The gifts that your ex gave on your birthdays or anniversaries suddenly will have no value. So, to find a solution to how to move on from an ex you still love, simply dump the things that remind you of him or her. Take off everything from your sight and let the memories disappear. 

 

11. Revamp Your Space

 How to Forget About Your Ex

Focus on creating a positive surrounding by revamping your space to forget your ex as quickly as possible. Work on displacing the furniture, and revamping the cozy corner where you used to cuddle, sleep, or binge-watch movies or shows can help you start afresh. A change in the setting will surely make you forget about the existence of your ex. 

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12. Do Not Stalk

Don’t take undue advantage of social media. Avoid stalking or ghosting your ex. Doing so will not only positively affect your mental well-being but also allow you to wean yourself off him or her. 

 

13. Stay Busy And Focus on Yourself

How to Forget About Your Ex

Begin the self-care season with a grin. Indulge in activities that you really love. Discover new hobbies, and keep your mind engrossed and busy. Focusing on yourself will let you analyze how to get over your ex your way.

 

14. Reflect And Realize What Went Wrong

Reflect and realize what went wrong in the relationship. First, try to stop romanticizing the relationship. Learn from the mistakes and consider them as life lessons. Look for things that you believe were wrong on your part. However, do not blame yourself completely for the end of your love story.

“Self-reflection helps you understand and process emotions, learn from the past, and embrace the reality of the breakup, ultimately fostering personal growth and emotional resilience. Combining self-reflection and acceptance offers a holistic approach to healing. While self-reflection provides the insight needed to understand and learn from the relationship, acceptance allows you to make peace with it and move on." says Pritpal Bhatia.

15. Think About What You Disliked 

There will be a lot of things you disliked about your ex and always wanted to change them. So to forget all about your ex, focus on the things that bothered you the most about them. 

 

16. Connect And Hang out with Family And Friends 

How to Forget About Your Ex

Connect and hang out with your near and dear ones, especially family and friends because they are your support group. Listen to their relationship pieces of advice and accept their care and love with open arms. 

Pritpal Bhatia further adds, “Support from friends and family plays a crucial role in helping someone forget about their ex and start afresh by providing emotional comfort, understanding, and companionship. They offer a sense of belonging and distraction, helping to reduce feelings of loneliness and encouraging new, positive experiences that aid in the healing process.”

17. Plan a Vacation 

To break the monotony of life, plan a vacation or a short trip. Maybe a weekend getaway with friends or an adventure to allow you to restart better. If you often ask yourself, “Why do I think about my ex every day?” — this is a great tactic to consider. 

 

18. Stop Destroying Yourself

Don’t harm yourself. Destructive habits will affect your well-being and not change the situation. Running away from breakups, pain, feelings, and emotions will never help you move on and find yourself. Embrace the heartache without choosing the self-sabotaging road.

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19. Don’t Force Yourself Into a New Relationship 

Don’t move on to another relationship too fast. Jumping into a dating pool after a few days can turn out to be a bad decision, especially when you are still not over your ex. Dating or planning future relationships before you are ready can only worsen your condition as well as spoil the life of your new partner emotionally. 

 

20. Work on Improving Yourself

How to Forget About Your Ex

Hit the gym, revisit your hobbies, read books, work on rebuilding your career, and invest in things that you love. After a breakup, you should be your top priority.

 

21. Stay Away From Alcohol 

“I can’t stop thinking about my ex!” — the most common reason that gets you high and paves the way to self-destruction. Sipping wine or a drink occasionally is fine, but frequent consumption of alcohol will never solve issues or help you deal with the pain of heartbreak and difficult times.

 

22. Accept Life the Way It Is

Accept the fact that whatever happens, happens for a reason. Acknowledge that life can be even better than before. Don’t crib over what you have lost. Rather focus on realizing your mistakes and find out the valid reasons behind what went wrong. 

 

23. Have Patience 

Patience — the healthiest choice to get over the past and embrace the present. Don’t expect to feel better overnight.  Be appreciative of all the memories when you are trying to figure out whether is it normal to think about your ex or not. Note that time heals everything and one day, you will move on emotionally. Give yourself sufficient time — weeks, months, or even, years, depending upon the term you have been together.   

 

24. Understand Your Behavior

How to Forget About Your Ex

Understand your behavior and try to distract your mind rather than asking everyone, “Why do I think about my ex so much?” repetitively. Ensure that you don’t force yourself to do things that you are not willing to do. Take it easy! 

 

25. Get a Closure

Lastly, get a closure. Understand the real reason behind your painful breakup, especially if it is sudden. Do not extract or dive deeper into the past. Analyze the case as it is to get a clear picture of what exactly happened. The information that you retrieve will calm down your wondrous mind and get you ready for a healthy relationship in the future or any kind of new beginning. 

Pritpal Bhatia says, “Common challenges when trying to stop thinking about an ex usually are lingering emotional attachment and nostalgia, disruptions to routine, and constant reminders through social media. Feelings of loneliness, self-blame, unresolved questions, and comparisons to new potential partners can also make moving on difficult."

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Why Can’t You Stop Thinking About Your Ex?

How to Forget About Your Ex

Why can't I stop thinking about my ex is often a question that your heart and mind keep tethering over. Below are a few reasons to put a full stop to the brainstorm: 

1. You have common friends so you come face-to-face quite often. Plus, due to the same social circles, social media stories, posts, and updates can include your ex.

2. You recall fond memories, especially when you visit places that you once visited as a couple. For instance, a restaurant, movie theatre, museum, park, etc.

3. You experience déjà vu when you find yourself in the same spot that you have been with your ex. Flashbacks usually make you think of your ex.

4. The power of social media never lets you forget your ex. Though you have drifted apart, you know what’s happening with your ex. 

5. You can “sense” your ex when your current actions indirectly flash memory of your ex.

6. You still use things that were gifted by your ex.

7. When you open up to friends, you switch on your heart-to-heart mode. The traces of the past can be felt in such scenarios. 

8.  Doppelgängers will remind you of your ex.

9. Events and invitations to a party can become tough if you are used to attending those with your ex-partner. 

10. You are yet to grieve completely and thus, feel the absence of your ex.

All of these are the reasons for your missing your ex to date. But, with time everything is going to be fine!

 

How Long Is It OK to Miss Your Ex?

How to Forget About Your Ex

This actually depends on the time that you have been together. Is it a few months? Or years of a romantic relationship? Typically, it is okay to miss your ex for 3 months. Once you understand and accept the reason behind why you split ways, it will be easier for you to forget them sooner. If you tend to miss your ex for years, then you should surely focus on addressing why their absence bothers you a lot. You can also seek professional help from a relationship therapist if you can’t get over your ex and that’s wreaking havoc on your mental health. 

 

It is completely okay to feel a range of emotions or to get carried away with the feelings of your ex. But, you should be in your senses all the time. Too much obsession with your ex can affect your mental and emotional health. Gradually, it will spoil your new relationships if you fail to learn how to forget about your ex. Hence, it is advisable to prioritize self-healing and self-care. Find out constructive ways to navigate through the problems to emerge stronger. Surround yourself with positive people and engage in activities that nurture you as an individual, and bring you infinite joy. With self-compassion, you can let go of the past and approach the future with renewed optimism.

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FAQ's

How come my ex moved on so fast?
Maybe your ex is an avoidant one and wants to get over things pretty quickly.

Who is most likely to move on first after a breakup?
There is no specific answer to this, it depends on the individuals involved. A person who was more emotionally invested in would definitely take some time to move on after a breakup.

How should I stop loving my ex?
You should learn to acknowledge the truth of the situation to stop loving your ex.

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About The Author
Anubhuti Mishra
Anubhuti Mishra
Relationship Expert

A marked inclination toward understanding human emotions and relationships led Anubhuti to become a certified Relationship Expert. With dual

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