41 Burning Questions to Ask Your Ex for Clarity, Closure, Or a Fresh Start

Are you feeling stuck after a breakup? Sulk not. Here are some key questions to ask your ex to understand their feelings better, so you can finally get clarity.

Anubhuti Mishra
Written by Anubhuti Mishra , Relationship Expert
Updated on May 29, 2024 | 02:33 PM IST | 3.2M
Burning Questions to Ask Your Ex for Clarity, Closure, Or a Fresh Start
Burning Questions to Ask Your Ex for Clarity, Closure, Or a Fresh Start

Trying to get clarity and closure or debating over a fresh start with your ex can be challenging and emotionally draining. But it is important to remember that you have the power to make the situation better. And with the right questions to ask your ex, you can gain insight into their feelings and thoughts. Moreover, it will help you understand their perspective so that you can have an honest conversation about the situation and figure out how to move forward positively.

Now, some people think asking deep questions is a bad idea. But if you are thinking of getting back together with your ex, it is probably worth the risk. Even if you don’t plan to move on, but happen to find yourself engaged in a conversation with your ex, these questions can help clear the air between the two of you and help you move past the breakup.

So, here are some essential questions you should consider asking your ex to help you gain clarity and closure or even open up new possibilities for a fresh start with them.

Questions to Ask Your Ex After Breakup

Questions to Ask Your Ex After Breakup


1. Do you think a calm conversation can sort things out between us?

2. What are the things you liked and disliked about me?

3. Which key characteristic of a happy relationship did we lack?


4. What did you think about our sex life?

5. What has been going on in your life since we broke up?

6. What did you learn from our time apart?

7. Do you think we should have consulted a relationship or breakup coach?

8. How often do you see our mutual friends?

9. Who was the first person you told about our broken relationship?

10. Do you think this breakup will affect our family relations?

11. Do you think we should see other people at this point or is it too soon to tell?

12. Do you think we should follow the "no-contact rule"? Or can you be just friends with me?

Questions to Ask Your Ex For Closure

13. What was the first thing I did that made you think that I was not a good partner for you?

14. Did I ever do anything to make you feel like I did not care about our relationship?

15. What made you decide to break up with me?

16. Is there anything that you regret not doing or not saying when we were together?

17. What were some of the major problems behind our dysfunctional relationship?

18. How did you feel when we broke up?

19. Do you think it was bad timing, or did we not love each other enough?

20. Do you regret what happened between us?

21. What are some of the things you regret doing?

22. When we were together, was there a difficult time when you needed me and I was not there for you?

23. Do you think I made you feel better or worse?

24. What is your opinion on rebound relationships? Will you get into one?

25. Do you think we shared a platonic relationship rather than a romantic one?

26. What is your worst memory of us?

27. Do you think either of us has behavioral issues?

Questions to Ask Your Ex Before Getting Back Together

28. What is the status of your current relationship?

29. What are you looking for in your future relationships?


30. What relationship skills would have made our bond better?

31. What was the best thing about our relationship?

32. Do you still love me?

33. Do you think we would be happier together than apart?

34. Do you have any unresolved feelings?

35. Do you believe that we had a healthy relationship?

36. What are your favorite memories from our time together?

37. How would you describe our relationship in one sentence?

38. What do you think about when you are alone and thinking about me?

39. How is your healing going?

40.  How do you feel about me now?

41. If we got back together, what things would you do differently?



We all have a set of essential questions we want answers to when we break up with our partner. You may want to know what they are up to these days, what is their new job, if they are in a relationship with someone else, or even if they think about you.

While there are numerous complicated questions that you can ask your ex, the above set contains some examples of the most important and constructive questions that you may want to ask your ex. These helpful questions will help you better understand their personality and where they are in their life.

The answers to these common questions will also help you make a decision that is right for you — whether to keep the flame alive and nurture the possibility of getting back together or moving on with your life without them.

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About The Author
Anubhuti Mishra
Anubhuti Mishra
Relationship Expert

A marked inclination toward understanding human emotions and relationships led Anubhuti to become a certified Relationship Expert. With dual



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