15 Key Characteristics of Real Love That Set It Apart From Its Counterfeits

Love is not just a feeling but also an action. This list of characteristics of real love will help you identify if you are genuinely in love with your partner!

Updated on Jan 24, 2023   |  03:41 PM IST  |  337.9K
A couple showcasing the key characteristics of real love
A couple showcasing the key characteristics of real love

How often have you asked yourself this question, "What is real love?" True love is not just a sentiment. It is a conscious choice. It is about giving more than you take and if required, being open to the possibility that there might be someone better out there for you. One of the most crucial characteristics of real love is that it undoubtedly is unconditional. This means that it does not matter how your current partner looks, the silly yet cute things they do, or if they share exactly similar beliefs as you or not; as long as they put in equal efforts to love you back (in their love language), you will feel loved by them.

In this article, you will discover some essential true love characteristics, how to spot a counterfeit version, and how to know if you are in a devoted relationship.


What is Real Love?

Love is a complicated topic, and there are many different ways to define it. Sadly, today people confuse true love with negative emotions like jealousy and possessiveness. However, real love is not just about the distinctive feelings you have for someone else. It is also about how those feelings make you feel and what they make you do.

So the answer to clarify your doubts and questions about true love can be summed up in a couple of lines. True love is when you feel a deep sense of connection with the other person. This connection is more emotional and mental rather than physical. Also, you are willing to accept that personal wholeheartedly, including their best and mess. Moreover, real love is not about perfectness (perfect partner or relationship); rather it is about choosing that person every single day for the rest of your life. As the famous American woman author, Ellen G. White wrote, "True love is not a strong, fiery, impetuous passion. It is, on the contrary, an element of calm and deep. It looks beyond mere externals and is attracted by qualities alone. It is wise and discriminating, and its devotion is real and abiding."


Top 15 Characteristics of Real Love And The Key To Healthy Relationships

Real love and admiration are among the handful of most life-changing experiences in one’s lifetime. Below are the real love characteristics that can help you figure out the true identity of love.


1. Trust

Trust is the characteristics of real love

In a healthy relationship, trust is of paramount importance and can be considered a key characteristic of real love. Trust helps in defining the quality of your connection. So, if you are not able to develop a certain level of faith in someone, you probably are not ready to be with them. However, trust develops gradually with time and matures over the course of a relationship, so it is best to give any relationship the necessary time.


2. Personal Enhancement and Mutual Growth

Personal Enhancement and Mutual Growth is the characteristics of real love


In order to share a loving relationship, each partner needs to work on themselves as well as the relationship. There are a few simple ways to do so, including open communication, participating in challenging and new activities together, expressing your concerns, setting couple goals, and trying to become the best versions of yourselves. Then, nothing can stop your bond from flourishing beautifully!


3. Need Fulfillment

Need Fulfillment is the characteristics of real love

Loving someone means you must put your significant other's needs in mind. Fulfilling their needs will make your partner feel appreciated, loved, and cared for. However, please understand that there is a fine line between putting up with your partner’s irrational demands, and prioritizing their desires. While the former will soon make you irritable over time, the latter will help boost genuine happiness in your current relationship.


4. Mutual Respect

Mutual Respect is the characteristics of real love

Respect for your companion is yet another love characteristic that gives your connection value. Nobody likes to be in a direct relationship where they are constantly criticized, demeaned, insulted, or dismissed. If someone is intentionally or unintentionally (yet frequently) verbally abusing you or addressing you by vulgar names, try expressing your concerns. If not, take it as a major red flag and consider stepping back, even if you are attracted to them.


5. Commitment, Promise, and Dedication

Commitment, Promise, and Dedication is the characteristics of real love

Commitment, promise, and dedication work together as three essential characteristics of real love and are among the building blocks of any amazing love affair or relationship. Commitment is a declaration of love, a promise is an assurance of intentions, and dedication is the fuel that keeps your relationship going smoothly. Together, these characteristics work as the pillars of real love, helping any connection withstand even the toughest of times.


6. Correct Communication

Correct Communication is the characteristics of real love

Correct and proper communication (which includes comprehension) is the tool that enables you to operate your relationship smoothly. So, instead of blaming the other person, try to voice the issue and be a problem solver. It is the ideal way to minimize the differences and misunderstandings between you and your partner.

7. Confidence

Confidence is the characteristics of real love

When you are in true love, there is no place for negative or fear-based emotions like anxiousness, jealousy, possessiveness, bad behavior, and physical or emotional abuse. If you cannot tell your partner how you actually feel for them or keep them in the dark about your feelings, they will always be in a state of doubt, thus affecting your bond.



8. Complete Acceptance

Complete Acceptance is the characteristics of real love

True love does not come with any conditions. A real connection functions properly only when you accept your partner's imperfections, flaws, weaknesses, and struggles because we are only human! Always try to understand where they are coming from. After all, a relationship is all about selflessly accepting differences while simultaneously celebrating your similarities.


9. Mutual Understanding

Mutual Understanding is the characteristics of real love

For any connection to work, one of the fundamental love characteristics that need to be present is mutual understanding. Couples who apprehend each other evolve as one. We all realize the importance of someone when we lose them. So, do not let your ego get in between you both. Instead, take charge of the situation to acknowledge yourself, your companion, and your wholesome relationship.


10. Ability to Let Go of Unrealistic Expectations

Ability to Let Go of Unrealistic Expectations is the characteristics of real love

Not every connection is picture-perfect, as shown in movies or written in novels. So, in order to make your relationship work, you need to let go of unrealistic exceptions while keeping it real. Believe in the concept of give and take; without burdening your companion with your constant demands.


11. Good Listening Skills and Patience

Good Listening Skills and Patience is a characteristic of real love

Listening and hearing are different things. If you patiently and actively listen to your partner, it shows how attentive and caring you are about their feelings, thoughts, and needs. In any relationship, it is crucial to actually hear, and in order to do that, you should keep your agendas, judgments, and opinions aside, and provide a safe space for your chosen person to express themselves.


12. No Fear of Abandonment

No Fear of Abandonment is a characteristic of real love

In any mature relationship, there should be a sense of security that can make each partner feel that their fears and struggles are not only theirs to bear. This established sense of stability gives both partners the strength to fight negative emotions while eradicating any irrational fear of abandonment.


13. Creative and Mutual Efforts

 Creative and Mutual Efforts is a characteristic of real love

To make your connection last, it is essential to make your significant other feel special and loved. Try to think of creative ways and new ideas to maintain the excitement and affection in your bond. It will require both of you to put in equal effort, and should not be a one-sided affair.



14. Support and Confidentiality

Support and Confidentiality  is a characteristic of real love

Couples share their innermost selves and intense emotions with each other. So it becomes yet another noteworthy love characteristic if you wish to keep your bond sacred and confidential. Even if your connection is going through a tough phase, you must assure your partner that things will soon be better between the two of you. Trust us, this slight gesture will positively strengthen your companionship!


15. Empathy

Empathy  is a characteristic of real love

Empathy is another lowkey yet notable characteristic of true love, especially when it comes to the longevity of romantic relationships. You need to be able to put yourself in the shoes of your partner to comprehend their point of view and behavior. It becomes a considerable act because it will help you understand what your spouse is going through and, in turn, allow them to heal, making your relationship flow with ease.




True love is not a fairy tale romance or simply a hormone-induced chemical feeling that only lasts for a few years. Real love is something that can last an entire lifetime - or even beyond! While decoding the several characteristics of real love may seem wild, remember that trust, acceptance, appreciation, mutual respect, unconditional acceptance, and having their best interest at heart certainly tops the list. Hopefully, this list of fifteen love characteristics will help you determine if your deep-seated admiration for someone is real love or not. It will also help you analyze where your partner stands when they say they love you!

ALSO READ:  Do I Love Him? 21 Signs to Discover Your Feelings


What does real love feel like?
From feeling like you can finally be your true self to feeling calm, secure, confident, content, and genuinely happy – real love will just feel all kinds of right.

What are the signs of true love from a girl?
To know if a girl truly loves you, try to read signs like her genuine care, her trying to impress you, maybe she'll lightly flirt with you, or she may try to bring up a conversation regarding a possible future.

What is the purest form of love?
Selflessness or unconditional love is the utmost purest form of love.

About The Author
Anubhuti Mishra
Anubhuti Mishra
Interior Designer & Home Décor Expert

With a marked inclination toward Interiors and a Post Graduation degree in Interior Design from VIFT Bangalore, Anubhuti... Read more


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